The last twelve months of lockdown has taught us a lot deal about ourselves and nudged many of us to think about what we value most in life. We’ve all had our preferences have been shifted.
There’s been times in which we’ve had the need to examine different aspects of ourselves too. To understand the way we feel when we’re at home, and to discover how much being with others makes a difference to our lives. A few of us have required to spend large amounts of time at home by ourselves because of work in person, family, friends, and even our lifestyle have all disappeared, effectively separated from our normal lives.
And then there are those who are in the constant contact with their families, partners or children as well as work having to be in constant contact at home, educating their children, and adapting to working and sourcing all their requirements on the internet, and having things delivered right to their home.
For some, it’s been a very special time and getting to know each other well while experiencing the highs as well as lows of lockdown. conversations, sharing moments, going for walks, cooking and eating together. They’ve forged new habits and aren’t ready to open the doors to the outside world.
Whilst others are eager to rejoin the world, eager to circulate , securing some of the most valuable bits from lockdown, yet not staying so tightly in a cocoon.
If you think about it, do you prefer to be by yourself or with other people?
Much is contingent on the circumstances at home. If we reside in a home that isn’t occupied will likely be relatively self-sufficient, already catering to our requirements, and taking advantage of the internet. It’s possible that lockdown hasn’t really had a significant impact on our lives.
For those accustomed to working from home, networking, having a full social and professional life as well as taking regular holidays or those who have been confined to home with restless children and their partners, endless zoom meetings , and no alternatives to get outdoors, it’s been an entirely different situation.
– Deciding to remain on your own or in a group depends much on what’s entailed and what the alternatives are. Sharing your thoughts with others may mean that you’re under pressure to talk or have a discussion, walk at their pace or make compromises. This can be too to handle, especially when you’re in desperate need of some downtime and some alone time. But they’re an enjoyable relief if you’re at risk of becoming too insular and secluded in your area and in desperate need of some motivation.
Sometimes, taking a regularly scheduled break in solitude, to perhaps sit with the kettle, take an hour-long soak in the bathtub or go out in nature , can result in you being relaxed and can return to a more relaxed state of mind. You’ve enjoyed a moment of peace and rediscovered some peace and feel more confident about the things you’re coming to.
– Then there are those of us with interests that no one in the family shares. Going for a run or golf may not be a priority for them. Therefore, doing it on our own ensures that we’re still able to be a part of it and not lose out on something crucial to us. Additionally, it adds an additional dimension to our conversations when we get back home.
A social gathering can offer encouragement and inspiration to accomplish things we’ve wanted to do but keep putting off. Other people can help us to explore new ideas or even encourage us to do something to try new things if we’re reluctant. However, in the event that they fall off their wagon, we may well become less motivated too.
Be aware that there are a lot of things we can begin doing together, but do it on our own. Swimming, a bike ride, doing online research and losing weight, or stopping smoking. These are all activities that we could choose to do together, but actually spend the majority of our time on our own. Yes, we may travel with others, check in regularly for updates and pep talks but the majority of our success is down to our individual efforts.
When we spend lots of time with our friends, scheduling a few minutes of time on our own can be a treasured, highly guarded moment. Awaiting with excitement for a day of your own, preparing your treats and how you’ll enjoy your me-time but then discovering that your friends are also enjoying taken the day off could be a huge disappointment!
Making time for your personal time regularly will significantly enhance your satisfaction. If you are able to leave your car in the garage for a quiet ten-minutes following work before returning to your hectic home life, it will make a significant difference to your mood , and also help get a handle on your day’s stress. Utilizing the drive home or taking a 10-minute break will allow you to divide the different parts of your day. This will allow you to recharge and look forward to resuming your life with a healthier mindset. Then you get the best by being in a space that is both private and together.
Susan Leigh, South Manchester counsellor, hypnotherapist, relationship coach and writer who also contributes to media provides support for issues with relationships as well as stress management, assertiveness and confidence. She assists clients on an individual basis, couples and provides group workshops and assistance.
She’s author of 3 books, ‘Dealing with Stress, Managing its Impact”, ‘101 days of Inspiration #tipoftheday’ as well as “Dealing with Death: Coping with The Pain’. All of them are available accessible on Amazon and featuring easy to follow sections, tips and suggestions to help get more confident about your life.